Walls!?

Will I stay,
or will I go?

Where I go
I do not know.

But I do know
where I want to be!

     I guess much hasn't changed since I was 10yrs old standing on the decayed, wooden boat rack on the edge of our front lawn, gathering the other children to watch me perform. The flame is still alive to shine a light on the world.

     Here I am in germany. I bought a one way ticket to Florence and wound up in Berlin, go figure! but this is a time I have embraced in my year of "Flying by Faith".

     One constant in my life, besides the Arts and searching for the Truth has been an annoying "brat" as Carol Kirkaptrick would say, that tells me I'm not moving fast enough, I'm not where im supposed to be...etc. It is in this time that I have been enjoying life without the brat. Yes, I want a better voice. Yes, I want to be fluent in German...and Italian (and French, Spanish, Russian, Gaelic....). Yes, I want, want, want! It is so easy to have not. It is also easy to have and be thankful for what you do have.

     These past couple of days, I decided to go back to Perleberg (where I participated in the Lotte Lehmann Academy) to visit a lovely family I befriended, Elisabeth and Eckart Topp...plus muttie (who is senile and spends most of the time in bed). Elisabeth prepared each meal, we spoke German and we spent time in nature. I have yet to figure out the steadiness of life in Berlin but I decided to visit the Topps, anyway. I do not know what the future will bring as far as committments and I thought I should visit before the weather turned too cold and before I wouldn't have time to escape my busy schedule. I'm living as though I am fulfilling my desires. ...and while Iwas not worrying, I found out I was doing all the things that would take me closer to realizing my dreams.

     I came to Perleberg Sunday morning. I rode my bike to the |Hauptbonhof at 8am. It looked easy enough on the map. I made it. From there, I found my way to Bad Wilsnack where elisabeth was waiting for me. She was very impressed that I was speaking auf deutsch and we had a lovely ride to Perleberg in the car, with tree lined roads and nature for miles in every direction.

     When I arrived, Elisabeth showed me my own apartment. I did not expect such a thing. I had two rooms, an attic, bathroom, kitchen, TV and great view of the weeping willow tree hanging over the canal. I would awake to silence, sun peering in through the windows, a bit of yoga, german TV and practice for the voice. Around 10am or so, I would join Eckart and Elisabeth for tea, warm milk with honey, bread, jelly, sausages, cheese and fruits. Each day contained a little adventure. one day was a bike ride by the canal with Elisabeth, the next was a car ride to Wittenberge where Eckart grew up. we rode by the cows, sheep, horses and the river with hardly a sole in sight but the older woman with an apron carrying two pales across the street, past the strand of pear trees to the chicken coup. The next day I met with Tino and Mena to connect and speak Italian at the Italian restaurant we frequented all the time during the Lotte Lehmann Akadamie.

     The first day, Eckart took me to see where the Russian soldiers and their families stayed during the DDR (Deutsche Demokratische Republik). One can see where there once stood a wall and all the buildings inhabited by the russian soldiers and their families. Most of these buildings are now abandoned. and only a slight vision of where the wall once stood. Elisabeth still keeps in touch with some of the Russian women who lived behind the wall. They were able to come and go, to purchase things in town but no Germans were allowed into the Russian occupied area. It is so interesting to get their perspective on life within the Socialist regime (what I and many others often called the Communist regime). They, as many other families, were very content with life prior to 1989, when the wall fell and Democracy reigned. They recall a life "kein angst". There were jobs for all, free care for the children when the parents went to work, and never a theft. Afterwards, it felt to them like an invasion of the West. The new people came with ideas of grandure, with money to spend that the Easterners had not. They saw a mentality shift from those that were content with what they have to a new found need for more. My friends also felt a lack of respect for the people of the east and the life that was before the wall. And yet, 20yrs later, I find a happy family that lived in the DDR and stayed in the east, where many others left. They are strong-willed people and determined to get the best out of life. They give freely and live in harmony. They buy meat from the local farmer, pick the apples from the trees, and ride on their bikes along the river every sunday. They have been many places in the east- Bulgaria, Russia, Poland but now they travel to the west, like when they will visit their daughter, son-in-law and grandchild in Paris.

     This is not a life in the far reaches of the world. No mudhuts with 2 mile walks to the water well. This is a life in the middle of Europe struggling to accept its current state of existance. This is a life unlike that I learned in history books of a people trapped behind a wall without contact with the outside world. These people traveled. They enjoyed a life without the greed of capitalism.

     Of course, everyone wasn't happy in the east. Problems arose when one was unhappy with what the east offered and wanted something from the west or spoke out against the system. And in Berlin, everything was different. The wall didn't fall between a great expanse of land between people who spoke different languages. This was the difference in Berlin. Those with jobs in the western part of Berlin lost them, along with their friends and family. People in East Berlin knew what they were missing. Eastern Germany was far more removed.

     Und jetzt,...here I am. An american in Germany. An american singer looking for an opera house position in Germany. I am not an unfamiliar site. When the wall fell 20 yrs ago, Berlin was swarming with american singers. But now, more frequent are the russians and koreans... and so the world turns.

     I am happy to be speaking german and italian. I am happy to have few things and little clutter. I am hopeful. I am taking each day at a time and learning a lot. I am even happy without my bike. Yes, it was stolen. The Hauptbanhof is not a good place to leave your bike. Even with a good lock.

And so, one story for another.

Much love and blessings.

A Taste of Berlin

     It is a perfect Berlin day. I left my cold yet naturally bright apartment, where I watered the plants on the balcony, sang happy birthday to my roommate, walked past the beautiful Heilig-Kirche across Zossenerstrasse, through the park and arrived at my most prized location, the Bibliotek. It is a large library with a separate music wing. Computers are available for internet at 30min intervals or for watching DVD/VHS, and there is a practice room with 2 upright pianos and even a place to lie down!

     Currently, I am sitting on the lawn infront of the library, resting my eyes from entirely too much reliance on the computer (mostly preparing my CV). The sun is beating on my back, comforting my body with necessary warmth. I fear the cold days are entirely too soon to come. But for now, I enjoy walking for hours to different locations, riding my new bike- the bike I bought at the Sonntag Flomarkt, originally 50€ but I was able to haggle down to 40€. He was a hard sell. it was one of the best fleamarkets I've ever been to. Used and new, tiny and large and lots of people. I also purchased a keyboard (with case), which I was able to bargain down from 40 to 25€, plus a black, H&M velvet jacket for 2€! That day, I bought a day pass on the U Bahn, one of the best run subway systems in the world (so they say...I'll let you know. I haven't used it much).

     Not everything is cheap. I took the Ubahn to the Gallerie, as well. This is like Macys in Manhattan or the Smithaven Mall on Long Island. There are many floors connected by escalators, housing mostly clothing. I went specifically to find a winter coat. I found some great styles for outrageous prices. Not too unlike that of NY. Coats from 150-400€, which is about 225-600 USD. I am left still in search of a good winter coat (that can withstand lots of snow and rain). I am hoping to find a really nice used one at one of these great fleamarkets that happen all the time. Tuesaday and Friday along the canal near my apartment, many Sunday locations and many more for me to discover.

 

     I am very blessed to have an apartment. This is all thanks to Georg, the german teacher from Perleberg. He lives in Kreuzberg (where I now am). He helped me get an apartment, learn german and many other necessities of getting around in a new city. He is extremely helpful and just an all-around amazing person. He is married to Einat, an opera singer from Tel Aviv, Israel. She is also a wonderful person. Last week, they hosted me and my roomie for a breakfast of fruits (grapes and plums are really big in germany--everytime we had a concert they would feed us green and purple grapes with plums...the plums are very good), French toast, coffee, tea, juice, and conversation. Tonight we will meet again for Gabriel's birthday. We will meet along the canal (one of the many in Berlin). However, this bridge along the canal is where many young people gather at night to play guitar, drink and be social. We will each bring something small to offer and sing for Gabriel. The pathways along the canal are very special. You can ride your bike, walk, sit on a bench or in the grass. People always gather on the grass - from young and old, from many different ethnicities and all in harmony.

     I find the key to Berlin is the harmony. There is an acceptance of people and things unlike any I have ever experience (be it in the United States, Canada, Venezuela, Italy, Perleberg, Hamburg, or Switzerland). I am not afraid to walk alone at night. Men do not stare or whistle when a woman walks by. The homeless ask for change and may linger but never act disruptive or angry (not yet anyway). Tattoes alongside veils, businessmen on bikes and everyone (not everyone but more likely than not) waiting at the crosswalk for the signal change- whether or not there is traffic in sight. There is and are everywhere graffiti on buildings, a bicycle covered in mud, upside down with candles as an impromptu art exhibit in the park, guitar strumming and songs on the grass day and night. There are people working to live rather than living to work.

     I hope the honeymoon with Berlin never dies. I decided to go cold-turkey with English in my pursuit to speak German. I have my first private german class tomorrow. Pray I find a job, my voice improves and everything falls into line with ease.

     My love to you all and thank you so much for your encouragement. you have no idea how you strengthen me.

 

Love and Blessings!